63. “Drag King Dreams,” Leslie Feinberg

I’m behind on reviews due to computer issues, so here’s a quick one:

I don’t know how Leslie Feinberg understands my life so well and manages to speak to me in exactly the terms I need to hear every single time I read hir. I saw this at the library and picked it up, promptly forgetting about it. A few days later, I had my first class on White anti-racism and social justice work and I can tell it’s going to be one of the hardest classes I’ve ever had. I can’t talk about race without talking about gender and sex and sexuality and disability and size and all of these big triggers. I was completely beside myself for a few days. With my computer broken, I picked up this book. It was exactly what I needed.

Page count: 302
Total pages: 18,029

6. “Stone Butch Blues”, Les Feinberg

Sighh. I just finished this one tonight. This book always feels like coming home. It is so beautifully written and comfortable. It’s just gorgeous and painful, and always hits home, though my own path has been very different. I’ve read and given away many copies of this book, and mine are all marked up. My underlinings all feel so intimate; I find myself constantly identifying with Jess and Feinberg. Ze gets it. This book always makes me want to talk about gender, both my own and gender in general, but like Jess, I hardly know where to start.

This passage is one of my very favourites, because I feel it so acutely:

My neighbor, Ruth, asked me recently if I had to live my life all over again, would I make the same decisions? “Yes,” I answered unequivocally, “yes”.
I’m so sorry that my life has had to be this hard. But if I hadn’t walked this path, who would I be?

Page count: 301 Total: 1993